Seriously, why are women so desperate to be engaged? I know you’re probably thinking that I can’t speak to this because I am in fact married. But, I have only been married for 6 months, and Ben and I have been together six and a half years now. We got engaged the day before our 5th anniversary of dating. I really didn’t think about when Ben would ask or how he would do it and certainly never doubted our relationship, but yes, I did eventually want to get married. I guess my main reason was that one final commitment, putting it in writing, changing my last name, making it completely official! But I wasn’t in a hurry, and honestly, I was sad about changing my last name; that was the most difficult thing for me in the whole marriage process.
For us, I don’t think the urgency was there because we both discussed and decided that having children wasn’t in our future plans. So I had no clock that was ticking. That damn clock seems to be a big reason women want to get married. But why else? To be the center of attention and show off that bling? Do they feel special or important to say they are married instead of single?? To just have a ring on a certain finger??? WHY?!? If you want a ring that bad, just go buy yourself a fancy piece and wear the damn thing!
Instead, women nag their man, pressure him, and in essence, push him away in the process. I never wanted Ben to feel pressured or obligated to ask me. I wanted him to ask because HE WANTED to ask. I wanted him to pick out a ring all on his own so it was a special ring to me, so I never planted any seeds to what my likes or dislikes were. All I ever told him was I’m not looking for anything fancy and he better not pay a lot for it. (Lucky him!) And the ring he bought me is gorgeous and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
I bring this topic up because my best friend is over-obsessing about getting engaged and honestly, I feel bad admitting this, but she’s driving me crazy so I can only imaging what she’s doing to her boyfriend! They’ve been together almost four years. She’s also seven years younger than myself – this puts her at only 26 years old! What is the damn rush?! Her boyfriend is also my age. But they don’t want children either. And, neither of them is even sure if they want an actual wedding ceremony and party! So I ask again, what is the damn rush?! She also obsesses about everyone she sees on her stupid Facebook feed that’s getting engaged. Why jump on any bandwagons and have to share your engagement with others? (That’s my philosophy…) I keep telling her to stop worrying about it and that those relationships are not hers and hers is not like anyone elses. It will happen when it’s supposed to but if she keeps pressuring her boyfriend, someone is going to get resentful and it will tear the relationship apart!
I truly believe too many people settle in a relationship and marriage, which leads to divorce or living life unhappy every single day. Who wants that?? I’d rather be on my own doing my own thing than wake up unhappy every day. So ladies: Don’t settle for anything less than what you want and what makes you happy! It’s so simple, yet so complicated. I guess it’s difficult for me to say because I always enjoyed being single and having my alone time or just doing what I want when I wanted. Don’t get me wrong though, I very much love having Ben in my life, someone to come home to and talk about my day with, travel with, laugh with; you get the idea. Some people just can’t seem to be happy on their own and that makes me sad.
What are other reason’s women seem to obsess over getting engaged?